You'd never expect it

You'd never expect it, but just about the time I feel like I'm getting really good at coping with my bipolar disorder, is when the whole thing comes crashing down on me. I've been feeling pretty confident in my coping skills and even talked on several occasions about my uncanny sense of purpose and confidence in general. Little did I know, it was mania in disguise!

What has my life come to, that confidence and a sense of purpose now have to be ogled and dissected...? I found myself sinking rapidly from a self-actualizing, coping individual into the deepest pits of depression since 2007. Why now? Everything seems fine in my life, I'm on the journey to fulfillment and have had several eye-opening "aha" moments in recent weeks. Maybe I haven't really been taking good care of myself, maybe I just thought I was... but I truly DID think I was doing the best I've done in recent years.

Today, I cycled rapidly through emotions from being excited about getting married to being seriously depressed without reason... from crying at everything and nothing at the same time to feeling utter numbness.

If there's one thing I don't like, it's the feelings that I experienced today. I had to keep reminding myself that I was making a choice on how to feel, that my feelings didn't control me. In my head, I shouted out loud "God please let me see the glass half full!!" because I was so desperate for positivity.

Well, tonight is a full moon... and that means that the intentions I set for myself are going to be the ones manifested under the full moon. So, I'm going to start setting MY intentions for manifestation. You can try the same, it's rather easy, and is a positive exercise for anyone and everyone at any point in their journey to self-discovery!


INTENTIONS

My life has purpose and meaning.
I will accomplish my dreams and even, beyond my goals, things that I cannot fathom possible at this present moment.
I am successful.
I am generous, kind, charming, and grateful.
I am beautiful and wise.
I am courageous and I never give up.
My endeavors are earnest and my labors are fruitful.
I am a blessing to all who meet me.
I will not hold a grudge and I will not judge.
I think before I speak and my words are uplifting and inspiring.
I am a vessel that God uses readily for His will and all of my works glorify Him.
I am flowering into that which God has intended me to be since before my birth.
I am patient on my journey and I am enjoying my life.
I take pride in myself and I nurture my finesse.
I admire my positive outlook on life and continue to simplify and thrive.
I am blessed beyond measure and dream about the great things yet to come.